Painfully adapting

Yesterday I killed my hip.  Well, at least I thought it was my hip.  Now I'm thinking it's actually my lower back. Regardless,  I don't want to push myself and make it worse so I am taking a complete rest. It didn't hurt me quite as much today but it still felt uncomfortable and not 'right'.

Those that have been following me regularly know that I have been struggling lately.  I've been making poor food choices all over the place and indulging far more frequently than would be considered 'healthy'.  I have been using my larger calorie allowance to spend on empty calories (after I meet the macros I aim for).

Last week I quit smoking.  *Gasp*  I know, it's not something I was proud of.  I was only having one evening cigarette a day with my husband, but it was kind of my nightly rebellion crutch.  Judge away, you might think "Ew, I didn't know she smoked" or "One a day? That's not even smoking", or if you're cool you'll just think "Way to go Megan".

Anyhow, last week I ate every single one of my exercise calories in addition to my regular ones and probably more.  I had a "Double Down", Tim bits, Lava Cake, easter chocolate, donuts, KFC... again, cupcakes, pizza, and more probably.  Yeah, not great choices. Lets be real though, it wasn't just last week, ever since the start of Push Phase I have really been struggling with poor choices (about 6 weeks ago).

So...  For now I have decided to eat less and go back to basics.  I spent the day going over my food diary during my more successful times and gathered some ideas for my grocery list. I also painfully set my calories lower to help balance out the fact that I am not working out for the next week.  The good news is that there isn't a lot of room for indulgences, and I think that's a good thing.  I'm going to get my feet back on solid ground, get my confidence back and really start from scratch.  When I can work out again I will bump up my calories and create a new normal for myself hopefully adding mostly healthy choices and keep my treats as treats and not every day events.

Today was my first day with lower calories, and while I did have the very last piece of birthday cake leftover from yesterday I was able to stay on track with all my other choices and end my day only 6 calories over.  I even said no to a second offered piece of cake and watched my husband devour his right beside me.  So today was a SUCCESS!